A Game of Noobs (a song of Goblins on fire) part 2

Hello and welcome to the second part of a Game of Noobs, firstly I must apologize for a grave error on my part the Repeated and uninformed use of the Name Alderic Steeltoe it is in fact Adalric Steeltoe. The person responsible for this mistake has been flogged and will never do it again, and now for a feature presentation.

As the Goblin raiders entered through the North Gate of Fort Denos, the party, Angelos and the Guards prepared themselves for an attack. during a heated battle ADALRIC! climbed up the wall in the fort and began throwing darts down at the hordes. Arturo drew his daggers and began to throw them at the goblins. Ashford ran into melee (with no armour =_= and armour is an allowed spelling, fuck you spell check) and swung at the nearest goblin. the guards took a charge from the goblins and dealt with the attacks after a couple of rounds and and a couple of casualties, Angelos just ran around throwing darts and killing goblins left right and centre (I hate American English spell check). But what of our favourite (spell check your not worth commenting on how wrong you are, no more of this joke be gone with you) Cleric/Ranger Ludok,  well he was a happy little camper as he rushed into the melee wielding a hammer in 1 hand and a sickle in the other hacking and smashing away at anything stupid enough to stay in front of him and giggling with joy as he was doing his gods works.

After ADALRIC! managed to get one of the Raid leader's body guards in the eye the bulk of the goblins began stupidly trying to clamber up the wall after him mostly falling on their backs and relieving pressure on the others Arturo got a rather nasty stab and began to retreat with Ashford covering his retreat (albeit without armour) the Larger goblins moved in on Angelos and Ludok. both managing to handle the attacks and Angelos slicing up the big ones as he went. however the Raid Leader took out a horn and blew on it another horn was soon heard from the direction of the west gate as the sound of more goblins were heading from there.The goblins continued to try and climb but ADALRIC! managed to get 3 of them with his darts and they fell down on their ally's swords and died more of the bigger goblins fell and Ashford after being wounded began to retreat and was saved from getting attack by a Dagger from Arturo. After the guards finished with their group of goblins several rushed to join the guards guarding the west gate but one brave young Asharnian soldier rushed at one of the body guards and with a moment of sheer blind luck skewered the Body guard clean through with his spear. His moment of Triumph soon ended when the Goblin leader standing right next to him cut him down with his axe  (okay axe you are really telling me axe is not right I hate you spell check)  leaving him bloody and slowly dying. ADALRIC! maintained raining dart fire (rather successfully considering his abysmal strength) whilst Angelos was dealing with the body guards attacking him and Ludok went toe to toe with the leader. the Leader manged to dodge his war-hammer twice but Ludok Got him with the Sickle in his off hand after a couple of rather nasty wounds the leader ran away But Ludok Gave chase and crushed the Goblins skull with his hammer.

After that another call was made and the goblins from the west gate retreated and those still left in the North court yard began to try an escape the problem was Angelos and Ludok was between them Ludok took rather an unsettling amount of joy in killing them though one managed to escape when Ludok calmed down and told it to surrender (it not being able to speak Asharnian (Common) and didn't understand what he was saying) it simply ran screaming in terror. After the battle the soldier in worst shape were patched up by Ludok and the still standing guards and the group retreated to rest.

Arturo went back to his room and saw Lektra waiting for him due to his wounds he was in no fit state to do anything a part from sleep Lektra had to carry him to the infirmary Ashford was also taken to the infirmary after the battle after losing much of his blood. But Adalric (yeah I gave up the capitals joke) sauntered off to his room his cheek patched up from a minor scratch he got and dozed off.

The Next Morning on the road south of Fort Denos a Large Knight on Horseback was heading north in search of work when he spots a traveler with a large book under his shoulder the Traveler flagged the knight down and asked is he could have a lift the knight Sir Titus (played by Alifornication) said his horse was rather temperamental and wouldn't allow the traveler to be on her back. Sir Titus rode on and suddenly caught a glimpse of the traveler now riding a stupidly fast Donkey (if you have seen the episode of The Black Adder called the Black seal you may get the reference) the Donkey then disappeared as the traveler bumps into a brick wall, Titus then notices a smoldering pile of Goblin corpses . The Traveler bemused himself by the occurrence dusts him self of and goes to the gate of the Fort he just bumped into (what a stroke of luck) as the guard opens he sees the traveler and Sir Titus Titus asks for somewhere to stay and if there are any jobs the guard was rather weary of strangers but the traveler then showed a something to the guard and and the guard let both of them in with out a word of complaint.

The traveler walked off and Sir Titus wen to the stables to let old Betsy (I think it was Betsy might have been Bessy) rest after giving some gold to the stable boys he told them he has a good memory and knows exactly what is in the saddle bags and will expect it to remain there. He then went to the mess hall and asked for some food. Ashford woke up his wounds being patched up and told he was lucky, Ashford shrugs at the injuries and decided to go get some rest elsewhere. Arturo wakes up and to his amazement isn't dead. his mood is worsened slightly when the doctor says he can't engage in any strenuous activity for atleast 2 or 3 days ( I guess Lektra will have to wait eh Arturo?) annoyed and fairly hungry he slinks off to the Mess hall after speaking to Angelos with Ashford they spot the strange Traveler talking to Angelos and writing down everything that is being said even when Arturo and Ashford walk in Angelos asks if they can find the Ludok to perform the Funeral Rites for the dead Guards and their grieving families (this can only go well) and for the party to try and find a way to stop the Goblins from raiding again using a more  peaceful method of persuasion.

Back at the mess hall Sir Titus is eating when Adalric appears and sits next to him and starts eating and tries to begin a conversation with him Sir Titus does not seem interested in conversing with him. soon after Ashford and Arturo appear with the money and Ludok appears soon after still covered in Goblin brains from last night, it seems he stayed up all night aiding the doctors in treating the wounded and hasn't slept since he arrived at the fort. the party add their payment of 50 gold from Angelos into the part coffers in from of Titus and he notices this and enquirers where they got this. he is asked if he would like to aid them in their little diplomatic mission he says he would need to speak to the captain of the guard first. 

Mean while Arutro asks the main cook where Lektra is (remember she's his daughter) and he quickly asks Arturo his intentions. Arturo despite himself nearly gets himself rather horribly killed by the cook. finds out she is with her cousin Georjus the Guard who Skewered one of the body guards only to get cut down. Arturo decides to see her later. during this time the Traveler appears asking for some food and shows his wrist to the cook the cook gives him a nod and the party see the Symbol of the god Vero the god of fate and Knowledge tattooed on his wrist. Adalric recognizes this to mean that the man is a member of the Lore Keepers a group of Bards who go around recording history as it happens in perfect detail. Arturo nearly puts his foot in it (again) when he tries to sneak the large book from the Lore Keeper away from him. whilst discussing their plans the party decide to have Ludok regale the Lore keeper with his life story and much of his out look on the world. after the plan is explained, Sir Titus goes to see Angelos with Adalric and Ludok following behind them.

Angelos agrees to pay Sir Titus a fare share and states several of his guard including Mykas will accompany the party once every one is healed, Adalric ask Angelos is he has any spare darts. Angelos nods and says the party is allowed to have equipment from the Armoury and for Adalric to come see him later he had something that Adalric could use. after Adalric and Sir Titus leave Angelos asks Ludok to perform the funeral rites, Ludok agrees and asks if the bodies of the goblins had been mutilated and displayed and asked if maybe the party should bring some of the bodies to the other Goblins to show good will to them Angelos thinks this might be a good idea and agrees to this idea. and thus ended the second session of the campaign

Will the party fuck up negotiations with the Goblins? Will Sir Titus be able to cope with hanging around a group of  eccentrics and Wackos? Will I find another way to cock block Arturo? find out next week, same bat time same bat channel.

A Game of Noobs (a song of Goblins on fire) Part 1

I have recently started a a AD&D 2nd edition campaign (last week as it happens) so I though I would post the (mis)adventures of my group of newbies (well some are newbies but they are pretty new to AD&D). this group us made up of players from a 4th ed game I briefly ran (and it sorta died). I'll use only their initials in the introduction then just refer to their characters.

First we have D who is playing a human Bard named Alderic Steeltoe (pronounced Ah Dool Rick) from the kingdom of Gelesri (which will be detailed in a later post but just imagine a bard that has a Dutch accent and you're half way there) a son of a Noble who has been booted out of a life of luxury by his father so that he can try and make a name for himself in the world.

Next we have K Playing Arturo Mendoza another human Bard  this time from the country known as Estaranda (imagine Spain ruled by Halflings) he is an Assassin (What? he is)  on his way for meeting a contact named Rosco at the Fort that the party start at but has yet to make contact with him.

Thirdly we have C playing Ashford a Human fighter from the Kingdom of Angura (Medieval Britain for all intents and purposes for those of you who care.) a former sailor who left service after a short term to become an adventurer.

Last but by no means least we have M playing Ludok a Half-Elf Ranger/Cleric (of Moresus the God of Death in the setting who is a sorta of Giant Humanoid vulture that swallows souls) who is well a bit touched in the head...

He lived in a monastery most of his life until it was raided and most of the priests were slain by bandits. Ludok trained himself and got revenge on the bandits but left the leader alive minus an arm he has an unnerving presence on most NPCs due to his nearly chirpy disposition when dealing with with death.

They are in the world of Ilobura (my own setting I'm working on) they are currently in the Asharnian Empire the largest power in Ilobura they have found themselves in the small Fort of Denos ( a modest fort with 3 entrances facing North, East and West) on the northern border of Asharn and the region known as the Wild Lands a large area of untamed forests, rivers and plains filled with countless barbarian tribes of Human, Goblin, Bugbear, Hobgoblin, Orc and far worst of all dragons the national emblem of Asharn.

The first session begins in Midsummer with Ashford entering Fort Denos through it's North gate weary from his travels and adjusting to life on the land again, he seeks rest and possible employment with the local guards, after entering and seeing the local population including women children and some elderly people. he finds a guard and walks toward the mess where he can hopefully get something to eat.

Meanwhile at the West Gate a charming Estarandan Bard name Arturo enters to the stares from much of the population  at the gate as he enters. he is tired and seeks food to and is shown where he could get some food.

Shortly after a Half-elf by the name of Ludok dressed in black robes with the symbol of Moresus the god of death wander in through the west gate much to the annoyance of the guards he is quickly told where to go so they don't have to deal with him also noting his farewell mentioning that he hopes they don't die horribly.

Last to enter again through the West Gate is a young Gelesrian Bard named Alderic he spots a couple of old men gambling and briefly joins them after a couple of games he grows bored and moves on to the mess looking to fill his belly.

moving back to Ashford he is in the mess talking to some off duty guards he learns that there has been several Goblin raids recently in the area and that captain Angelos is buy working and wont be able to talk until he is off duty after a 24 hour shift.

Arturo enters shortly there after and sits at another table strumming his lute (not a euphemism), and calls for some water the serving woman shyly gets it for him he continues to play on his Lute and asks if the serving woman has seen a  man with a large mustache my the name of Rosco is in the fort she says she hasn't seen him.

Ludok enters and excitedly scuttles over to Arturo's table and quickly introduces himself he then goes over to the Innkeeper and asks for some spoilt (why is this a red squiggly line it's the correct spelling... wait squiggly is fine but spoilt isn't? well done spell check well done)  food. the Innkeeper is very annoyed by the insinuation he serves rotten food. and finds some stale-ish bread and cheese to sell to the odd cleric in front of him.

Alderic is the last to enter the quiet mess hall and notices Arturo's lute and quickly introduces himself and buys the best beer the Innkeeper has for a toast to his new friends, Ludok gets drunk after one mug of the stuff but the other continue to drink and chatter, Ashford sees the group of travelers and introduces himself to them.

After more drink and food time passes and the mess-hall begins to fill up with off duty soldiers women and children Arturo seizes the opportunity to earn a  little travelling money by playing a song from Esatranda, Alderic accompanies him on his own lute after a few fumbles whilst playing but managing to cover up each others mistakes Arturo puts down his lute and leaves Alderic to play alone whilst he dances with the serving girl from before. after a brief dance number there are many cheers and Arturo and Alderic's efforts are rewarded with some coin and a smitten serving girl on Arturo's arm. Ashford sees a group of soldiers playing a game of darts and laughing a giant of a man in the middle of the group is captain Angelos a friendly man who seems interested in hiring the party, with him is his lieutenant Mykas who just laughed and joked with the other soldiers. Angelos challenged Ashford to a game of darts but Ashford declined getting jeers and laughter from the other soldiers after his reply. Alderic challenges the captain to a game and gets a bullseye and wins the bet of 1 gold from the captain much to the delight of his soldiers.

During the merriment Ludok talks to some of the locals about the gloriousness that is Moresus then moves on to talk of Equirus the First Paladin and a legendary hero in Ilobura. meanwhile Arturo is flirting with the serving girl called Lektra and asks her to his room she says she will come see him after lights out.

As time passed the group move off to bed and Arturo gets a knock at his door it is Lektra as she promised. as she is about to disrobe a large bell rings out in the night a look of terror on her face all she says is "It's Goblins" the party all wake up and suite up in their armour (it is an excepted spelling fuck you spell check) and enter into the chaos, They hear thuds from the west and the east, They found Captain Angelos wearing armour and carrying a two handed sword on his back.He asks the party for help and assigns them a group of 20 guards to help them defend the West Gate. Arturo quickly rushes to the kitchen, with Alderic following right behind him, They search for oil and something to carry it in. as they search they find a cauldron and a large amount of oil they carry the cauldron of oil with the help of some guards lift it up and our oil over the invaders. Alderic throws a torch at them setting the invaders on fire. after a brief spout of high fives the party quickly head to the east gate where Mykas and the other group of soldiers sent by Angelos are faring less well 10 of the guards sent to the east gates were already dead but so was many of the Goblins. 5 goblins remained and Mykas was wounded the party joined the fray.

Ludok quickly heals the injured lieutenant as the goblins advanced the party did their best to hold of but the goblins where awkward buggers to deal with after a couple of minutes Angelos appeared appeared and took out most surviving goblins the party dispatched the last goblin but not after taking a couple of wounds and a couple shots of friendly fire at Mykas from the Bards. after a brief moment of pause for breath and to patch up Arturo who took a nasty wound from a Goblin they hear more commotion. More Goblins were attacking this time from the North gate the party, Angelos and the healthy guards still standing rushed to the north gate just in time for the gate to burst open. this was the end of the session.

Will the party survive the onslaught of Goblins?, Will Arturo get to pork Lektra? Will I stop hurling abuse at spell check?, find out next week. same Bat time Same Bat Channel.