A Game of Noobs part 3 (A Clash with Kobolds)

Well this comes a bit late (almost time for the next session to happen) but here it is part 3, First a couple of notes about absences, Ashford and Arturo were NPCd. one was called away at short notice the other didn't turn up at all. this means that the party was Adalric, Ludok and Sir Titus. this is still a usable party so I let the session happen.


The session began with the Party Healing up from their wounds slowly but surely. Adalric went to see Angelos about the things he had for him it turned out to be a set of 9 high quality darts and 2 potions of cure light wounds, Adalric thanked Angeolos and headed to the mess hall.


 Ludok decided to dissect the Goblins to use their putrefying organs for a sort of poison ( a brief and conversation happened pointing out that Ludok had to be good for being a ranger (my fault for not paying attention to rangers) and thus suddenly Ludok had a slight (very slight) personality shift). Adalric in the mean time was in the mess hall drinking whilst talking to Mikos (Lektra's father for those of you keeping track) bring sup something about Arturo... that he is in fact a EUNUCH (wait I spelled that right huh I'm improving) Mikos seemed to process this and thought it made sense how Arturo could sing so well. after that Adalric asked for his wine skin to be filled with the strongest stuff Mikos had, Mikos obliged  and filled it. Adalric went to look for Ludok when he found him Adalric offered Ludok some wine, Ludok refused and Adalric down the the entire skin (hey he had a skinful *drum sting* @) and instantly passed out form the stuff.


Ludok performed the funeral Rites (done surprisingly well for an ad-lib by Ludok's player) whilst Adalric watched carefully nursing a rather shocking hangover and Titus walked into the mess as he felt he had no reason to attend the funeral. afterwards the party met with Angelos and were told when they were to move out. 


And so the day came where Adalric, Ashford (NPCd), Ludok  and Sir Titus moved out (Arturo was busy doing something else not sure what but he was doing something (possibly Lektra? or maybe he was singing to her he's a Eunuch according to Adalric) accompanying them was Mykos, Georjus (Lektra's cousin) and 7 other guards and 4 draft horses tied to a wagon...

I'm sure the wheel will get us there faster.

As they journeyed  on they drew out the banner that belonged to goblins from the raid and a were quickly met by a patrol of Goblins on Worg-back the Goblins they followed to a large encampment. with over 500 goblins living there and many slaves...

The party was told to dismount to see the leader of the tribe Ekon a smug bastard of a Goblin who constantly beat  his interpreter (an elderly slave) the terms were set by Ekon for peace from his tribe to the Empire deal with a a tribe of Kobolds (see that's why I used the title) Titus demanded that the Ekon give them some sort of proof that they would have his word. Ekon shrieked out for a goblin named Grak to accompany the party before the party could leave the party were stopped and Ekon demanded a hostage on his side Mykos and 4 of the guard stayed with the goblins.

The party moved out with Grak and his slave/interpreter a young Asharnian girl named Lyra. during a rest Titus disarmed the sleeping Grak and tied his hands up Grak was shrieking and tried to bite at the Titus but all he got was a punch to the face for his trouble and a missing tooth. so the party moved on and found the entrance to the cave the Kobolds where living in it had a 5 ft high entrance and about 8 ft wide no way most of the party were gonna get in through that way easily. so Sir Titus and Ludok go hunting for some rabbits and start to cook them outside the entrance wafting the smell into the cave. after a few minutes the party fell into position and Adalric climbed a tree to gain a better vantage point... after another few minutes a group of 10 Kobolds came out of the small entrance...

10 of these lovely little creatures (design from AD&D 2nd edition)

Titus attempted diplomacy but the Kobolds couldn't understand him then they saw Adalric in the tree and starting screeching, Titus shouted at Adalric to get down Adalric nodded but as he tried the climb down he slipped and came crashing to the ground.

During the confusion Grak had stepped out and started screaming at the Kobolds this led to them throwing their daggers at him and starting a fight. this small band of Kobolds didn't last long and were rather easily dispatched. the party was patched up and began to move into the cave very carefully. after few minutes they bumped into a patrol of Kobolds not that was an issue I mean they dealt with the others right?...

YAY! I'm several years behind with my memes

Sadly no, the party that entered the cave consisted only of Adalric, Titus and Ludok 3 guys 2 competent fighters the other was Adalric. The Kobolds numbered 15 and Nuffle had decided that the party didn't deserve to win that day. as Titus and Adalric fell to negative hp (-7 for Adalric and -5 for Titus) the Kobolds retreated after taking a few losses but they could have easily dealt with Ludok just hanging on to conciseness. 

EAT IT BITCHEZ!!! (a traditional Kobold tribal moto)

Ludok managed to drag his fallen comrades out of the cave and they began to recover and that's where the session left off. and thus end part 3 of A Game of Noobs any lessons learnt? yup Nuffle is an evil bastard

Will the Party Deal with the Kobolds? Will everyone turn up next session Will we find out what Arturo was doing? find out next time at the Right Bat Time Right Bat Channel.





@ the Term skinful actually does come from drinking wine from a skin according to some sources so it's less of a joke and more of a statement of fact...

A Game of Noobs (a song of Goblins on fire) part 2

Hello and welcome to the second part of a Game of Noobs, firstly I must apologize for a grave error on my part the Repeated and uninformed use of the Name Alderic Steeltoe it is in fact Adalric Steeltoe. The person responsible for this mistake has been flogged and will never do it again, and now for a feature presentation.

As the Goblin raiders entered through the North Gate of Fort Denos, the party, Angelos and the Guards prepared themselves for an attack. during a heated battle ADALRIC! climbed up the wall in the fort and began throwing darts down at the hordes. Arturo drew his daggers and began to throw them at the goblins. Ashford ran into melee (with no armour =_= and armour is an allowed spelling, fuck you spell check) and swung at the nearest goblin. the guards took a charge from the goblins and dealt with the attacks after a couple of rounds and and a couple of casualties, Angelos just ran around throwing darts and killing goblins left right and centre (I hate American English spell check). But what of our favourite (spell check your not worth commenting on how wrong you are, no more of this joke be gone with you) Cleric/Ranger Ludok,  well he was a happy little camper as he rushed into the melee wielding a hammer in 1 hand and a sickle in the other hacking and smashing away at anything stupid enough to stay in front of him and giggling with joy as he was doing his gods works.

After ADALRIC! managed to get one of the Raid leader's body guards in the eye the bulk of the goblins began stupidly trying to clamber up the wall after him mostly falling on their backs and relieving pressure on the others Arturo got a rather nasty stab and began to retreat with Ashford covering his retreat (albeit without armour) the Larger goblins moved in on Angelos and Ludok. both managing to handle the attacks and Angelos slicing up the big ones as he went. however the Raid Leader took out a horn and blew on it another horn was soon heard from the direction of the west gate as the sound of more goblins were heading from there.The goblins continued to try and climb but ADALRIC! managed to get 3 of them with his darts and they fell down on their ally's swords and died more of the bigger goblins fell and Ashford after being wounded began to retreat and was saved from getting attack by a Dagger from Arturo. After the guards finished with their group of goblins several rushed to join the guards guarding the west gate but one brave young Asharnian soldier rushed at one of the body guards and with a moment of sheer blind luck skewered the Body guard clean through with his spear. His moment of Triumph soon ended when the Goblin leader standing right next to him cut him down with his axe  (okay axe you are really telling me axe is not right I hate you spell check)  leaving him bloody and slowly dying. ADALRIC! maintained raining dart fire (rather successfully considering his abysmal strength) whilst Angelos was dealing with the body guards attacking him and Ludok went toe to toe with the leader. the Leader manged to dodge his war-hammer twice but Ludok Got him with the Sickle in his off hand after a couple of rather nasty wounds the leader ran away But Ludok Gave chase and crushed the Goblins skull with his hammer.

After that another call was made and the goblins from the west gate retreated and those still left in the North court yard began to try an escape the problem was Angelos and Ludok was between them Ludok took rather an unsettling amount of joy in killing them though one managed to escape when Ludok calmed down and told it to surrender (it not being able to speak Asharnian (Common) and didn't understand what he was saying) it simply ran screaming in terror. After the battle the soldier in worst shape were patched up by Ludok and the still standing guards and the group retreated to rest.

Arturo went back to his room and saw Lektra waiting for him due to his wounds he was in no fit state to do anything a part from sleep Lektra had to carry him to the infirmary Ashford was also taken to the infirmary after the battle after losing much of his blood. But Adalric (yeah I gave up the capitals joke) sauntered off to his room his cheek patched up from a minor scratch he got and dozed off.

The Next Morning on the road south of Fort Denos a Large Knight on Horseback was heading north in search of work when he spots a traveler with a large book under his shoulder the Traveler flagged the knight down and asked is he could have a lift the knight Sir Titus (played by Alifornication) said his horse was rather temperamental and wouldn't allow the traveler to be on her back. Sir Titus rode on and suddenly caught a glimpse of the traveler now riding a stupidly fast Donkey (if you have seen the episode of The Black Adder called the Black seal you may get the reference) the Donkey then disappeared as the traveler bumps into a brick wall, Titus then notices a smoldering pile of Goblin corpses . The Traveler bemused himself by the occurrence dusts him self of and goes to the gate of the Fort he just bumped into (what a stroke of luck) as the guard opens he sees the traveler and Sir Titus Titus asks for somewhere to stay and if there are any jobs the guard was rather weary of strangers but the traveler then showed a something to the guard and and the guard let both of them in with out a word of complaint.

The traveler walked off and Sir Titus wen to the stables to let old Betsy (I think it was Betsy might have been Bessy) rest after giving some gold to the stable boys he told them he has a good memory and knows exactly what is in the saddle bags and will expect it to remain there. He then went to the mess hall and asked for some food. Ashford woke up his wounds being patched up and told he was lucky, Ashford shrugs at the injuries and decided to go get some rest elsewhere. Arturo wakes up and to his amazement isn't dead. his mood is worsened slightly when the doctor says he can't engage in any strenuous activity for atleast 2 or 3 days ( I guess Lektra will have to wait eh Arturo?) annoyed and fairly hungry he slinks off to the Mess hall after speaking to Angelos with Ashford they spot the strange Traveler talking to Angelos and writing down everything that is being said even when Arturo and Ashford walk in Angelos asks if they can find the Ludok to perform the Funeral Rites for the dead Guards and their grieving families (this can only go well) and for the party to try and find a way to stop the Goblins from raiding again using a more  peaceful method of persuasion.

Back at the mess hall Sir Titus is eating when Adalric appears and sits next to him and starts eating and tries to begin a conversation with him Sir Titus does not seem interested in conversing with him. soon after Ashford and Arturo appear with the money and Ludok appears soon after still covered in Goblin brains from last night, it seems he stayed up all night aiding the doctors in treating the wounded and hasn't slept since he arrived at the fort. the party add their payment of 50 gold from Angelos into the part coffers in from of Titus and he notices this and enquirers where they got this. he is asked if he would like to aid them in their little diplomatic mission he says he would need to speak to the captain of the guard first. 

Mean while Arutro asks the main cook where Lektra is (remember she's his daughter) and he quickly asks Arturo his intentions. Arturo despite himself nearly gets himself rather horribly killed by the cook. finds out she is with her cousin Georjus the Guard who Skewered one of the body guards only to get cut down. Arturo decides to see her later. during this time the Traveler appears asking for some food and shows his wrist to the cook the cook gives him a nod and the party see the Symbol of the god Vero the god of fate and Knowledge tattooed on his wrist. Adalric recognizes this to mean that the man is a member of the Lore Keepers a group of Bards who go around recording history as it happens in perfect detail. Arturo nearly puts his foot in it (again) when he tries to sneak the large book from the Lore Keeper away from him. whilst discussing their plans the party decide to have Ludok regale the Lore keeper with his life story and much of his out look on the world. after the plan is explained, Sir Titus goes to see Angelos with Adalric and Ludok following behind them.

Angelos agrees to pay Sir Titus a fare share and states several of his guard including Mykas will accompany the party once every one is healed, Adalric ask Angelos is he has any spare darts. Angelos nods and says the party is allowed to have equipment from the Armoury and for Adalric to come see him later he had something that Adalric could use. after Adalric and Sir Titus leave Angelos asks Ludok to perform the funeral rites, Ludok agrees and asks if the bodies of the goblins had been mutilated and displayed and asked if maybe the party should bring some of the bodies to the other Goblins to show good will to them Angelos thinks this might be a good idea and agrees to this idea. and thus ended the second session of the campaign

Will the party fuck up negotiations with the Goblins? Will Sir Titus be able to cope with hanging around a group of  eccentrics and Wackos? Will I find another way to cock block Arturo? find out next week, same bat time same bat channel.

A Game of Noobs (a song of Goblins on fire) Part 1

I have recently started a a AD&D 2nd edition campaign (last week as it happens) so I though I would post the (mis)adventures of my group of newbies (well some are newbies but they are pretty new to AD&D). this group us made up of players from a 4th ed game I briefly ran (and it sorta died). I'll use only their initials in the introduction then just refer to their characters.

First we have D who is playing a human Bard named Alderic Steeltoe (pronounced Ah Dool Rick) from the kingdom of Gelesri (which will be detailed in a later post but just imagine a bard that has a Dutch accent and you're half way there) a son of a Noble who has been booted out of a life of luxury by his father so that he can try and make a name for himself in the world.

Next we have K Playing Arturo Mendoza another human Bard  this time from the country known as Estaranda (imagine Spain ruled by Halflings) he is an Assassin (What? he is)  on his way for meeting a contact named Rosco at the Fort that the party start at but has yet to make contact with him.

Thirdly we have C playing Ashford a Human fighter from the Kingdom of Angura (Medieval Britain for all intents and purposes for those of you who care.) a former sailor who left service after a short term to become an adventurer.

Last but by no means least we have M playing Ludok a Half-Elf Ranger/Cleric (of Moresus the God of Death in the setting who is a sorta of Giant Humanoid vulture that swallows souls) who is well a bit touched in the head...

He lived in a monastery most of his life until it was raided and most of the priests were slain by bandits. Ludok trained himself and got revenge on the bandits but left the leader alive minus an arm he has an unnerving presence on most NPCs due to his nearly chirpy disposition when dealing with with death.

They are in the world of Ilobura (my own setting I'm working on) they are currently in the Asharnian Empire the largest power in Ilobura they have found themselves in the small Fort of Denos ( a modest fort with 3 entrances facing North, East and West) on the northern border of Asharn and the region known as the Wild Lands a large area of untamed forests, rivers and plains filled with countless barbarian tribes of Human, Goblin, Bugbear, Hobgoblin, Orc and far worst of all dragons the national emblem of Asharn.

The first session begins in Midsummer with Ashford entering Fort Denos through it's North gate weary from his travels and adjusting to life on the land again, he seeks rest and possible employment with the local guards, after entering and seeing the local population including women children and some elderly people. he finds a guard and walks toward the mess where he can hopefully get something to eat.

Meanwhile at the West Gate a charming Estarandan Bard name Arturo enters to the stares from much of the population  at the gate as he enters. he is tired and seeks food to and is shown where he could get some food.

Shortly after a Half-elf by the name of Ludok dressed in black robes with the symbol of Moresus the god of death wander in through the west gate much to the annoyance of the guards he is quickly told where to go so they don't have to deal with him also noting his farewell mentioning that he hopes they don't die horribly.

Last to enter again through the West Gate is a young Gelesrian Bard named Alderic he spots a couple of old men gambling and briefly joins them after a couple of games he grows bored and moves on to the mess looking to fill his belly.

moving back to Ashford he is in the mess talking to some off duty guards he learns that there has been several Goblin raids recently in the area and that captain Angelos is buy working and wont be able to talk until he is off duty after a 24 hour shift.

Arturo enters shortly there after and sits at another table strumming his lute (not a euphemism), and calls for some water the serving woman shyly gets it for him he continues to play on his Lute and asks if the serving woman has seen a  man with a large mustache my the name of Rosco is in the fort she says she hasn't seen him.

Ludok enters and excitedly scuttles over to Arturo's table and quickly introduces himself he then goes over to the Innkeeper and asks for some spoilt (why is this a red squiggly line it's the correct spelling... wait squiggly is fine but spoilt isn't? well done spell check well done)  food. the Innkeeper is very annoyed by the insinuation he serves rotten food. and finds some stale-ish bread and cheese to sell to the odd cleric in front of him.

Alderic is the last to enter the quiet mess hall and notices Arturo's lute and quickly introduces himself and buys the best beer the Innkeeper has for a toast to his new friends, Ludok gets drunk after one mug of the stuff but the other continue to drink and chatter, Ashford sees the group of travelers and introduces himself to them.

After more drink and food time passes and the mess-hall begins to fill up with off duty soldiers women and children Arturo seizes the opportunity to earn a  little travelling money by playing a song from Esatranda, Alderic accompanies him on his own lute after a few fumbles whilst playing but managing to cover up each others mistakes Arturo puts down his lute and leaves Alderic to play alone whilst he dances with the serving girl from before. after a brief dance number there are many cheers and Arturo and Alderic's efforts are rewarded with some coin and a smitten serving girl on Arturo's arm. Ashford sees a group of soldiers playing a game of darts and laughing a giant of a man in the middle of the group is captain Angelos a friendly man who seems interested in hiring the party, with him is his lieutenant Mykas who just laughed and joked with the other soldiers. Angelos challenged Ashford to a game of darts but Ashford declined getting jeers and laughter from the other soldiers after his reply. Alderic challenges the captain to a game and gets a bullseye and wins the bet of 1 gold from the captain much to the delight of his soldiers.

During the merriment Ludok talks to some of the locals about the gloriousness that is Moresus then moves on to talk of Equirus the First Paladin and a legendary hero in Ilobura. meanwhile Arturo is flirting with the serving girl called Lektra and asks her to his room she says she will come see him after lights out.

As time passed the group move off to bed and Arturo gets a knock at his door it is Lektra as she promised. as she is about to disrobe a large bell rings out in the night a look of terror on her face all she says is "It's Goblins" the party all wake up and suite up in their armour (it is an excepted spelling fuck you spell check) and enter into the chaos, They hear thuds from the west and the east, They found Captain Angelos wearing armour and carrying a two handed sword on his back.He asks the party for help and assigns them a group of 20 guards to help them defend the West Gate. Arturo quickly rushes to the kitchen, with Alderic following right behind him, They search for oil and something to carry it in. as they search they find a cauldron and a large amount of oil they carry the cauldron of oil with the help of some guards lift it up and our oil over the invaders. Alderic throws a torch at them setting the invaders on fire. after a brief spout of high fives the party quickly head to the east gate where Mykas and the other group of soldiers sent by Angelos are faring less well 10 of the guards sent to the east gates were already dead but so was many of the Goblins. 5 goblins remained and Mykas was wounded the party joined the fray.

Ludok quickly heals the injured lieutenant as the goblins advanced the party did their best to hold of but the goblins where awkward buggers to deal with after a couple of minutes Angelos appeared appeared and took out most surviving goblins the party dispatched the last goblin but not after taking a couple of wounds and a couple shots of friendly fire at Mykas from the Bards. after a brief moment of pause for breath and to patch up Arturo who took a nasty wound from a Goblin they hear more commotion. More Goblins were attacking this time from the North gate the party, Angelos and the healthy guards still standing rushed to the north gate just in time for the gate to burst open. this was the end of the session.

Will the party survive the onslaught of Goblins?, Will Arturo get to pork Lektra? Will I stop hurling abuse at spell check?, find out next week. same Bat time Same Bat Channel.

DnD Next (and sorry for the delay)

Well it's been a while, a very long while so firstly I would like to apologies for the lack of posts from and Alifornication. but as DnD Next has officially started I  figured now is a good at time as any to get things moving again :D. so my first impressions on the DnD Next stuff so far... I like it. the lac of 4e stuff is noticeable (some things for the better I have to say). also I have to say to all those moaning on how the classes are boring or not very inventive let me kindly say and with all due respect please could you all SHUT THE FUCK UP! it is a play test an early one at that they said there will be more stuff for the fighter and I have no doubt there will be I imagine the the maneuvers mentioned will act much like the 4e stances (well at least I hope I love the Slayer and Knight classes). now as for healing...yeah it needs some work there needs to be more than just hit dice or maybe more hit dice than just 1 for every level but that's a minor thing and can be remedied with a simple house rule. The basics of healing seem fairly lack luster this could be an issue with the play test characters having better HP meaning that most heals aren't that effective I think clerics either need some more healing abilities (or at least some clerics). a work around this is the healer feat that allows you to make potions and other healing items which costs 25 gold per item... for an edition stated not to rely on gold a good source of less need for a cleric requires an awful lot of gold. of course a DM can easily house rule this like most things that DnD Next is meant to be about giving the DM creative freedom.

I have read through the caves of chaos and it looks fun, sadly I haven't had a chance to run it yet. the classes seem fine enough and magic missile being an at-will cantrip does not bother me, it does 1d4+1 damage per missile with a new missile every 3 levels damage potential is minimal and yes I know it's auto damage but the Slayer theme for the fighter can do some damage on a miss and instantly kill any Kobold but it's a fucking Kobold they have officially been demoted to weaker than goblins and their whole shtick is is to mob the PCs the rules even gives them advantage if they outnumber the party. speaking of advantage and disadvantage I automatically liked it when I saw it I find it hard to fault and it gives a balance. instead of just being a system of advantage it now works both ways and the awarding of it is based on DM fiat instead of a rule in the hands of a good DM this will be a very good thing to have in the hands of a bad one well...

All in all I like what I see and will make a follow up when I finally get to playtest it I will however be posting again on the blog so hopefully some cool stuff will appear soon until next time this is Owler signing off for now.

Something Real Horrorshow...

I would like to apologise very much that this has taken me so long and that the blog hasn't been updated in a while. Some real life stuff has intervened but we are doing our best and we love every one of you who have visited this page. So, here we go

This is the story of a pathfinder campaign I ran  nearly a year ago at university. The aim of the game was simple. A dungeon crawl though the villain's castle that was greatly inspired by the Castlevania series. There was a small village at the base of the castle that the party could go to rest up and restock and so on. The interior of the castle was full of portals that lead to other locations that couldn't possibly exist within a castle (You know, a dwarven stronghold, a crypt full of undead, a jungle with lots of exotic creatures and so on). It was nothing amazing, but it did the job quite well. When I was gathering players for the game I made it clear that the game, 1) was an old school dungeon crawl, 2)  would have very few roleplaying opportunities (only with eachother and a small handful of NPCs) 3)would have a LOT of combat, traps and puzzles, in fact that would be pretty much the entire game, and finally 4) would be about a group of people just having a laugh and a fun evening.

    Now I'm aware that this type of game isn't for everyone. That is why I made sure that people knew what they were signing up for. I expected a LOT of optimisation and a party that was almost impossible to kill. This is what I got;

1. A paladin who was rather dense but nails in combat.
2. A dis-arming fighter that was also nails in combat.
3. A sorceror that had a bunch of damaging spells and a few decent utility spells
4.A cleric that chose two domains which were largely similar who prepared mostly cure spells even though she could spontaneously cast them.
5. A barbarian that dissappeared after the first game.
6. A rogue who only spoke in halfling, used a double ended sword without the exotic weapon prof. feat, no ranged weapon and was very against teamwork. In a dungeon crawl.
7. A bard, who you shall know more about later.

Now you may look at that list and say, 'Hey, Alifornication, that seems like a solid group, why are you bitching about them when some of us don't even have a group at all.' Well fuck you if you are the type of person who would suffer someone trying to shit up your game just so you can play. Man up and tell them to fuck off.

With my inner /b/tard silenced, we can continue. I was asked a few questions during char.gen. that made me cringe.

Them - "Hey can I change my deity's favoured weapon?"
Me - "Why?"
Them - "Because it doesn't fit with my character idea"

Now, any other game, I would have let them do it. But in this, I didnt care about super special snowflakes, I didnt care about tragic backstories or anything. I wanted their crunch so they could kick down doors, kill everything that isn't them and take everything. So I said,

Me - "No, you will have your scimitar and like it."
Them - "Man, you are making it difficult for me to want to play this.
Me - "How? Because I won't give you everything you want? If I give you this, I have to do something for everyone. Now please, stop trying to make a snowflake made of gold."

Another question.

T - "Should I take the weapon prof. feat for a double ended sword first or take two weapon fighting."
M - "Weapon prof. feat will let you use it as a two handed weapon with no penalty."
T - "Uh, yeah ok. I'm gonna take two weapon fighting"

I just shook my head. This came from a guy who had been playing d&d most of his life and was apparently a 'munchkin'. This guy was the rogue. He spent all his gold on a weapon he couldn't hit anything with and some lockpicks, thus no ranged weapon.

And the bard? Well, you will have to wait for next time.

Any comments? Is this boring you already? Am I a crappy writer with a crappy output rate or just crap in general? Let me know, down below.

Till then, peace be the journey.

Issues with alignment (a minor ramble by Owler)

It has been brought up a lot recently especially with the news of D&D Next being prominent news in the community and it had already been confirmed through leaks but officially said in today's Rule of Three article by Rodney Thompson that the next edition will have the original 9 alignments (Lawful Good, Neutral Good, Chaotic Good, Lawful Neutral, True Neutral, Chaotic Neutral, Lawful Evil, Neutral Evil & Chaotic Evil for those who didn't know them)  in the 4th edition it was scaled down to 5 getting rid off all the neutral alignments (good being a mixture of neutral and chaotic and evil becoming a mixture of lawful and neutral)  and introduced the Unaligned option which would mean they have no Alignment if the word was used properly.

It makes me wonder why they couldn't use the word Neutral well the same reason people would interpret it differently many people interpret it to mean do what they want which isn't right same goes for the classic Chaotic Neutral. many people see it as just acting crazy and doing what ever the hell they want...

 the second part is admittedly true but the first part isn't always true not all chaotic neutral characters do completely random things because they can, some characters of this alignment could even have very complex motives and drives and also be quite cunning in their methods and plans...

What many people think when they here Chaotic Neutral.

A much better way to play Chaotic Neutral in my book.

so where am I going with this...um wait I had a point to make somewhere...
Oh right yes alignments personally it can be very very difficult to make a campaign that doesn't focus on good vs evil with out it becoming difficult. if the party know they are the good guys then the villain hasn't got much going for them if they have to be evil. also doesn't it really depend on perspective for instance the Drow are considered to be mostly Chaotic Evil (originally) then Neutral evil now in a standard setting where they are constantly back stabbing (literally in many cases) there isn't an issue. but say you want to do a campaign based on political intrigue or exploration of different cultures views of good vs evil where do you start with out making certain things completely evil or completely good it gets to point where you have to step back and make certain races designated bad guys.

Well with my personal idea of just 3 alignments it becomes less of a difficulty these 3 alignments are simply Lawful, Neutral and Chaotic with good and evil being objective on the scale it doesn't prevent Chaotic Good nor does it prevent Lawful Evil with it just being those 3 you are less bound as a DM and a Player in some circumstances. with the old alignment system Paladins had to be Lawful Good in my idea they would just be Lawful and couldn't act in a Chaotic act or ally with people who acted in an opposite manner to their leanings (Lawful leaning towards evil couldn't hang around Chaotic leaning towards good and vice versa).
it allows for more complexity in the way you portray villains, this is admittedly if you want this complexity if you are happy to run it with Good vs Evil then by all means do it this is just my opinion.
That's really all I have to say on the subject really tell me what you guys think Comment is free and it's fun to debate certain things (providing it doesn't turn into a flame war), Until next time this is, Owler signing off for now.

Confessions of an Average DM 4 (The Life of an NPC)

One of the most important things for a campaign is it's NPC's the thing is they also can also be the hardest thing to get right.

Depending on the campaign depends how much NPCs factor in of course some times they are treated merely as quest providers and that's fine if that's the campaign you are going for then you don't need to go develop them any further then go to cave and kill X amount of goblins (the problem with that is well it's too much like a computer game in my opinion) now I'm not against Dungeon Crawls they are fun but require a great deal of work and we are talking about NPCs anyway. but then one day you suddenly have an idea for roleplaying that could greatly change the way the group plays the campaign (make sure that this is a good idea before doing so or you may regret it) and so you produce a very plot relevant NPC with a personality and  mannerisms and everything else you could think of what could possibly go wrong...

Well a lot can, firstly you must try to make a personality that isn't automatically irritating.(stupid speech pattern, overwhelming urge to perform "zany" antics) in one case (I was a player) we met an NPC who was prone for crazy antics such as stealing a wagon for us to travel in and causing the ere of the city guards. he then found a pair of shoes that allowed him to teleport (soon after the party jumped him , knocked him out and stole his shoes he then woke up and ran away crying like a baby) it later turned out he was the mayor of the next town we came across (much to our unending joy).

Then again they have to at least be a little bit original (well most of the time) it soon becomes obvious if they are a Drizzt clone or even if they are a clone of any other campaign or literary character (well unless the party have no clue about the setting in that case clone away).

Oh Drizzt how many DMs and players have copied you I wonder.

One thing is for certain when it comes to at least important NPCs (doing it for every NPC would be needlessly complicated) you should probably note down certain things about them (appearance how they speak, how the present themselves any important secrets that will be possible plot hooks later on etc).

Another thing some people might not do which is a shame is develop ideas and change things to fit better as long as something hasn't been well established yet it can be changed I had a fairly important NPC start off with  a very weird background after a couple of times having that character interact with the party I realized it would spoil too much of future plot points (and other characters that were yet to be introduced) I also changed their backstory for a another reason they had a strong link to the current party of characters but then, I thought what if so and so died then, shit too many plot holes. so I changed it and it worked  a lot better, pity the campaign died (my own fault).

The final thing I can think of that could be an issue with NPCs is the possibility is the creation of a Mary Sue character. Most people know what these creatures are and are rarely liked especially if the campaign becomes centered around them and not the PCs (great way to kill a campaign there if it gets too over the top).

so um yeah I think I've rambled on long enough on NPCs, next entry will be about Villains. until next time this is Owler signing off for now.   

An Introduction of Sorts (part 2)

    Right then, I've decided I've been quiet for far too long. Hello everybody, I'm Alifornication, the other half of the Dungeon Monkeys. Whereas my co-blogger has jumped right in with his 'confessions of an average DM' my posts will have no such order or theme. Instead I will be posting allsorts of stuff starting with a post (or three) about a short lived campaign I ran a while back. I suppose my main focus will be tabletop and wargames and how NOT to play both but I may talk about other topics too. Now that the boring part is out of the way, let's get stuck into a pathfinder game. Also, to those who read this, please leave comments or vote or whatever it is you do on these things.

Till then, peace be the journey.

Something extra (a brief review of Heroes of the Elemental Chaos)

I recently got my copy of Heroes of The Elemental Chaos and I thought I'd give a very very brief opinion on the 2 new classes introduced in the book.

Firstly I will briefly mention the new options for Druids, Monks and Warlocks. all in all a few nice things the new Sentinel build is a nice touch having one focusing on a Druid that focuses on waste lands such as deserts can be pretty good if you were doing a dark sun setting or one that focuses on deserts in general the new option for the core druid I just shrug my shoulders new option that's all really for me. the new Monk stuff kind of cool and new build options allow for some new ideas like a Monk with high charisma  interesting idea I spose, Warlock Elemental pact interesting if you like elemental themed warlock over fey or other sources of power.

Now to talk about the new classes, first the Elementalist Sorcerer, In my opinion a nice edition to 4e (shame it comes in the Twilight of 4e's lifespan and not earlier. as an essentials class it's pretty good very simple and can do a lot of damage the fire Elementalist just in general seems to be the best for damage but obviously is limited to fire attacks so against fir enemies they are kinda screwed for damage they also eventually get a unique move option but fire gets probably the best with an at-will teleportation speed wheres as air focused ones get fly speed (which is handy but still provokes opportunity attacks.Waters swim speed can be useful as for   Earth's burrow speed just... too bad you don't get this bonus till level 23 by which point most epic destinies do far more interesting shit but all in at least it seems fun to play.

The Sha'ir Wizard, oh where do I begin, oh yeah easy zzz. seriously this class just looks so boring less spells then any other wizard type and a mildly better (well more combat orientated) familiar over the witches options special power to separate them from the others... you can change a daily power or utility once a day from any other power of the same level. so a bit better version of the wizards spell book a problem is well it's any spell form any of the published books there are at-least 6 or 7 books with wizards spells so if you use this power you will be flicking through books a lot if you want to choose a new spell more fitting to you (if you have the online character builder then it's not as much of a big deal but still) so probably half the time you will not use this feature meaning you have a mediocre wizard with a meh familiar. stick with the mage or core wizard (or the Bladesinger they're awesome) or even the witch if you are so inclined.

that's my general thoughts on the classes I like heroes of the Feywild stuff more but maybe it's just the stuff that was added in it was more to my kind of thing (I gotta admit I like the Bard and Barbarian options in that book) this was a ramble about D&D 4e, this is Owler signing off for now.

Confessions of an Average DM 3 (life on the rails)

Welcome again weary adventurer to this little blog, a bit of a delay getting it out but we move on to our next topic of story in a campaign. in all honesty I must admit when it comes to railroading I can think of a few times I have done some rather egregious attempts of railroading. I have improved over the time as a DM and have had around a years worth of DMing experience all told (only really been playing table top RPGs for little over 18 months so 2 thirds of that as a DM) some examples I have done include making it rain rather violently so the party had to stay in a town for plot to happen because the party where simply (an admittedly sensibly) flee the town before bad shit happened  =_= not a very good way to handle it and the campaign soon fell apart shortly after not just because of this but it was one of the first warning signs in hindsight.

Railroading the Eberron way

 This moves on to my main point (how well is up to you) how important is story in a campaign , well it really does depend on the DM and the players of course I my self like having a very plot-centric campaign in my own setting using my best ideas when ever I can this means however I use the rails rather strictly, however I have learnt to use rails in a good way I simply use the characters backgrounds (which I insist on my players having at least some form of backstory) as a means to move the story forward sometimes successfully sometimes not so much having villains be part of an an important plot hook for a player is a good way of keeping the player interested but has its own problems such as the player thinking that the campaign is about their character and what if that character dies what then, simple you improvise but in a more open ended campaign just using a world as a back drop you can get around a character death or even a total party kill by shifting focus to somewhere else entirely with new characters (admittedly this is depends very much on the group) but if the actions of the old party did effect the world for the new party the players might like this touch and it would be  a good way to improve your abilities at building a campaign setting.

I think I should talk a little more about open world or sand-box type campaigns it pretty much is  a type of campaign with little in the way of a main story, well this can be untrue and in some great campaigns I'm pretty sure it can be very untrue the trick with the open world campaigns with plot is well a lot of things happen behind the scenes (and therefore in the DMs head) if you can pull off a world like that more power to you because it will take a lot of effort (and lots of notes). if you have an idea for a story line in this world for the party to interact with then one of the better ways is to make changes to it if need be such as instead of one country being involved in some form of dastardly plot to destroy another make it one that is nearer to the characters a cheap tactic I admit but it would feel better over the party is suddenly transported to another part of the world entirely against their will the party are far less likely to rebel if you do it the first way.

All in all plot rails can be a good way to control a campaign as long as you don't make them the only option it can lead to a fair few unhappy players and then an unhappy DM. Well that's all I have to say for story focused versus open world settings, this is Owler signing off for now.

Confessions of an Average DM 2 (starting out)

I feel mildly stupid for forgetting to add one of the main focuses on the DMing aspect of my blogs (well GMing as i wont be talking about D&D in particular) is that it will mainly be tips on DMing and how to start out which is what today's subject is about.

Firstly and probably the most sensible thing need is to actually want to DM. an odd statement sure but some people are asked to DM by their group or just end up it as they put up the least fuss if that's the case well the campaign most likely wont last long I've seen campaigns die after 1 session even if they have promise.

Second have at least a basic grasp of the actual rules maybe you've been in a heavily house ruled campaign and never questioned the DM you suddenly start a game with a completely new group some people are new others have the same amount of experience playing as you. it can be rather embarrassing if a player who has been playing far less than you have know the game better (I have seen this happen between 2 players and it is rather "interesting" to say the least) .

You will also need patience the life of a DM is not a happy one 9 times out of 10 (I may be exaggerating a bit) but if the party demolish everything you throw at them or don't follow the large number of plot hooks you throw at them (some even come with a glowing neon sign attached saying follow me for fuck sake this is getting really boring you arseholes) you have to persevere and not decide to attempt to stab one of your players with a d20 (a reason for this is they are less than a sub optimal weapon the best stabbing implement I suggest a pen (or a knife) as a more effective alternative...wait I think I had a different point there) the best way to avoid this in the first place is to know your group and what they expect from it is the group a bunch of role players and you keep throwing them monsters to kill with out plot that may be a big reason for them rebelling or just not caring about your efforts. It may also be a good idea to know if you actually like the people you are playing with before starting a game, common sense again but sometimes you don't have the time to judge (like if you are running an online game for instance) I'd say have character building session or atleast one to see if people can actually get along.

Finally well you need to be reliable this goes the same for each player in the group the difference is if one player can't make it or can't make it you can work your way round their absence if you aren't there there isn't a game at all. oh and try not to fall for one of your players I've seen that happen too... well that was the basics I think I most likely have forgotten  several things which will get added if they are important enough. but for now this is Owler signing off for now.

Confessions of an Average DM 1 (an introduction to Owler)

Hello everyone sorry for a delay in updates but that's going to change from now on this is a more personal introduction to me so here it goes, my name is Owler and I'll be handling most of the D&D and DMing related stuff being added to this blog I will also be blogging about campaigns I am working on in the future as sadly my recent campaign ended recently. I am also working on a campaign setting of my own (a Pantheon and a basic idea of the geography has been written down but needs a lot of work) I also am the person responsible for the name of this blog (and have grown to regret as I found out what it meant =_=) but there's my first lesson for people don't go for the first name to pop into your head sometimes it might turn out embarrassing. anyway that about wraps up my first proper post here expect to here from me soon all the best, Owler.

An introduction of sorts:

Welcome, brave wanderer, to Dungeon Monkeys.

About us:

The Dungeon Monkeys are Owler, (who will be hosting his blog confessions of an average DM) and Alifornication (who agreed to the name of this blog before he knew what it meant) both big fans of table top games and other general nerdy shit. Over the coming weeks and months we hope to bring you lots of self rightious, self opinionated natter about things people could only care about on the internet (well at least we're honest!)
So, stick around as there will be posts appearing soon. Until then, Dungeon Monkeys, signing off.